July 2009
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Calvin Johnson > Larry Fitzgerald
With the end of July comes the beginning of training camp throughout the NFL. We are but a scant 6 weeks away from the beginning of the season, and teams are going to be spending that time evaluating their players, setting their depth charts, and implementing new schemes if they have a new coach or coordinator. The build up to the regular season is an exciting time to be a football fan. In honor...
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Rookie RBs Will Disappoint This Season
With the end of July comes the beginning of training camp throughout the NFL. We are but a scant 6 weeks away from the beginning of the season, and teams are going to be spending that time evaluating their players, setting their depth charts, and implementing new schemes if they have a new coach or coordinator. The build up to the regular season is an exciting time to be a football fan. In honor...
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I Hate You Brett Favre
Brett Favre “retired” today. Again. I am certain he did it just to spite me because I guaranteed he would play for the Vikings this season. Or more likely, considering that he is reportedly still going to keep throwing balls and training, the lazy attention-whoring prick is just trying to get out of a week of training camp. And I am sure Childress is thrilled that he spent all...
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RIP Jim Johnson
[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.854914&w=425&h=350&fv=] more about “Philadelphia Eagles assistant Jim Joh…”, posted with vodpod From the Associated Press: ”Jim Johnson, whose attacking defenses helped the Eagles to one Super Bowl appearance and five NFC title games, has died. He was 68. Johnson had taken a leave of absence from the team in May as he continued to...
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QB Choke Slam
I was supposed to post some thoughts I have on running backs for this upcoming football season, but I accidentally spent all day yesterday drinking. Whoops. In the meantime, enjoy this hilarious clip from the Vikings/Eagles Playoff game Hambone and I went to last season: [vodpod id=ExternalVideo.848799&w=425&h=350&fv=] more about “Quarterback Choke Slammed -...
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The Good, The Bad, And The Cassel
With the end of July comes the beginning of training camp throughout the NFL. We are but a scant 6 weeks away from the beginning of the season, and teams are going to be spending that time evaluating their players, setting their depth charts, and implementing new schemes if they have a new coach or coordinator. The build up to the regular season is an exciting time to be a football fan. In honor...
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Don't Think
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Now To Figure Out How To Give It A Vagina...
Ladies- Let this be a fair warning for you to stay in line. You have no idea how easily you can be replaced:
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I Hate Weddings
We had to go to a wedding this weekend for one of Sassafras’ friends from high school. It was “exciting” as we were literally the only people from our group of friends (and peer group) there, aside from a sole bridesmaid. It is a good time to attend a wedding and reception with a bunch of old people you don’t know. Highlights from the day include: [caption...
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Happy Moon Day!
40 years ago today, man landed on the moon for the first time. OR DID THEY?!?!?! *dramatic music* Spoiler Alert: Yes, they did.
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They Didn't Think This Through
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I'd Watch It
If TV Executives were intelligent, they would use this as a the theme song for a delightful new animated series about a sexually confused, holier-than-thou pastor instead of airing yet another bullshit reality show, especially ones about some guy who likes to bang fat chicks. And hooray for blog posts that would have been funnier 2+ years ago. Fuck you guys, go watch CNN if you want timely...
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Best Use Of Autotune I've Seen (Or Heard)
This is about as interesting as the talking heads in American politics can get:
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Prey Alone - Short Film
This is a very entertaining short film. Extremely impressive visuals for such a small budget. Great writing, nicely paced, and has an ending that you wont see coming (but won’t anger you either). [vodpod id=ExternalVideo.848193&w=425&h=350&fv=autoPlay%3Dfalse] more about “Prey Alone | Other | Atom”, posted with vodpod
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The Ugly Truth Is That This Movie Will Suck
[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.857790&w=425&h=350&fv=m%3D55500632%26type%3Dvideo%26a%3D0] more about “THE UGLY TRUTH trailer in HD Video by…”, posted with vodpod Goddamn this movie makes me want to punch myself repeatedly in the dick. The premise is stupid, even for a romantic comedy: A feminist career-focused woman is forced to work with a womanizing bad boy....
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Happy Birthday Nikola Tesla!
Nikola Tesla was born July 10th, 1856. A genius and visionary of extraordinary talent, he is one of my favorite figures in history. There is very little I could say about the man that would do him justice, so I won’t bother to ramble on about why he was such a great individual. But I do sincerely hope that you will take a look at the wonderful website put together by PBS that has an...
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Grace And Beauty
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I Hate Ayn Rand
superpoop.com Oh Drew, you make me happy to be alive. Check out Superpoop.com already damn you. Because you are reading this, I am going to go out on a limb and assume you are not completely retarded and are at least passingly familiar with toothpastefordinner.com and nataliedee.com. But I am pretty sure the fine work these folks do at both Superpoop.com and MarriedToTheSea.com goes largely...
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HULK VAGINA SMASH!!!
Lookee. [gallery] It is absolutely terrifying that there is a Russian woman running around on the “loose” with a vagina that can lift 14-Kg. (~31 lbs.) Just imagine the things she could do to your penis… I can’t decide if it turns me on or makes my penis want to run away in fear. American women: the gauntlet has been thrown! Are you really going to let the Russians hold...
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Discussing Air McNair Death With Hambone
Steve McNair died on Saturday, July 4th, in an apparent murder-suicide. This lead to this delightful little text message exchange between Hambone and myself: ____________________________ DeScepter: McNair death was a murder-suicide. Hambone: I know…dumb bitch DeScepter: I luled. Bitches are crazy. Hambone: They were dating apparently and he tried to break it off …so she shot him 4...
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Ghost? No. Shadow? Yep.
Apparently, a man can’t even walk in front of a window nowadays without suddenly being called a ghost. Besides, the goddamn thing was clearly not moonwalking so there’s no way it was Michael Jackson’s ghost. Duh.
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America, FUCK YEAH!
Today is like, important and shit. Lets celebrate! Oh, and uh, happy Saturday to the rest of the world.
